In my circle of Christian friends, we guys sometimes talk about getting our dream partners, the qualities of Proverbs 31 woman often come up.
Our colloquial is that if we want to get a “10″ (meaning perfect score in our reasonable standards), we must be a “10″ ourselves.
The qualities/characteristics/personality should at least be worthy/matching of that partner’s we are seeking.
I had an interesting conversation with a friend that day about the Proverbs 31 man and pointing out how often guys want a Proverbs 31 woman without being a Proverbs 31 man ourselves.
She was taken aback.
“You mean, there is a Proverbs 31 man in the Bible?”
Me: “Yea, only thing is that people often only read about the Proverbs 31 woman.”
I made a short list on Post-it and pasted it on my Bible several years ago, in a vain but considerable attempt to be one myself.
And since that conversation, I extended that list. Now, I’m neither a Bible scholar nor Christian author, but this is what I have to say to the guys who are constantly looking for their Proverbs 31 woman. Most are inferences, hopefully logical.
It’s time we match up if that is what we want.
The Proverbs 31 Man is
vs 1. honoring to his mom. he listens to her wisdom
vs 2. an answer to his mom’s prayers (see footnote)
vs 3. does not spend excessively (time and money) on women and keeps good company
vs 4. finds himself unsuitable for drinks, be it wine or beer, if he so decides to be a person of tremendous influence (can’t help but think of Pastor Kong’s personal committment to God about drinking)
vs 5. careful against drunken stupor
vs 6 & 7 cool about others drinking
vs 8 courageous and defends the weak, pleads for the needy (think Gerald Ee)
vs 9 wise and have good judgement
vs 10. rich. Both emotionally and financially
vs 11. secure and trusting
vs 12. Judicious about the quality of woman he chooses
vs 13-22 (focusses primarily on the Proverbs 31 woman)
vs 23 successful in the marketplace, a leader in his chosen field and sits on boards of both profit and non-profit organizations.
vs 24 willing to let his wife step into her destiny without hindrance.
vs 28 &29 able to be extravagant with praise and encouragement.
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So ladies, if a guy comes to you next time expecting you to be a Proverbs 31 woman, this could be something you can match it with. ;P
I’m reviving my blog again. Look out for it this June!
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WA!!!! u are back!
I’m afraid I might have to disagree with you on vs. 4 (not about Pastor Kong’s personal commitment).
A man with a fine taste of beer and wine could be one of tremendous influence too. :p
As women, we sometimes read this passage and we see such disparity between this woman we want to be and the women that we are. Prov. 31 is a wonderful vision of what we should strive for, but I think we often get bogged down by the challenge of it. When I did an exegetical paper in college on this passage, I was shocked to discover that the passage was actually written to a man! While I still long to be such a godly wife for my husband, it is freeing to know that God uses the Proverbs 31 husband and wife to work together towards sanctification.
Hi Cheyennerene,
Thanks for dropping by and leaving a comment.
It’s indeed a high calling to be a Prov. 31 woman. Many women are lied to by the devil when he attacks her esteem and worth.
Sometimes, we men are guilty of helping the devil do his dirty chores through our lack of encouragement. Like you said, it’s a journey together towards sanctification. I used to want a “proverbs 31″ woman and expect myself to match up, until a older, wiser woman reminded me that the Proverbs 31 woman in that chapter came from a long way to where she is, probably with most part of the journey as a married one. Life’s a journey. I’m trying to bear that perspective whenever I feel frustrated with my own progress.
take care!